Bad patch and questioning the present facing a blank future

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Hi dear readers,

(Warning: I mostly question my life due to professional issues, in a personal aspect my life is going quite well).

I hope you are going well, or you should feel better than me at the present time. Still two days and one full week before Xmas holidays. I must underline that I crave to close and « bury » this year. It’s been an rollercoaster, almost an ordeal and many events, various emotions and beginnings and endings have come and gone. At work, life hasn’t been easy, quite tough sometimes. Hopefully, some colleagues make me laugh, sometimes I find the older (or younger?) me, the other me who can laugh and make fun of situations and of people without any wicked thought.

Yesterday was quite a long day, with ups and downs, mostly downs but in the end I did quite well (especially in the end of the day). Monday has also been a long one. I loathe Mondays, Tuesdays. It may change. We will soon see. By the way, my life could change a bit as of January and I hope it will change the way I plan. I cross my fingers and trust my Deities for a better beginning for a new year.

Many thoughts were running through my head, this was quite busy inside and I wish I could write everything on a piece of paper to get back to these thoughts as they would help me improve my reasoning when it comes to growing up and becoming a better teacher. Do I still want to keep going in this profession? I am wodnering myself as this job requires solid nerves and a certain detachment as teens tend to be crueller and show less and less respect to grown-ups and authority in general.

This morning I was advised not to vent about my hardships and that I should do with them. Actually it’s not that simple and it’s more easily said than done. He is not wrong but at the same time you may feel horribly down, crap and left on your own devices, with few tools to help you get back to the surface to breathe.

Yeah, I can’t wait fro Xmas to come as this year I am going to celebrate a so-called Xtian day based upon pagan beliefs in my two families, for the very first time in my life.

Sorry for not cheering you up through my posts but it seems winter and I are at odds.

Take care!



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